All the participants seemed to agree that the lack of communication was crucial to the development of divorce. There was a lack in agreement by the two parties that eventually causes the marriage to develop gaps and cause the people to stop communication. The people did not want to communicate effectively and these led to the resentment and frustration of both parties involved. The people had stated that lack of communication and lack of comprehension what require leads to the formation of gaps in communication. Some of them complained that their partners were yelling, not taking enough, sarcasm. This explains that the lack of communication leads to more confusion. Moreover, they conceded that this was their fault (Hetherington, 2014). All these aspects were stated to be reasons for allowing a lack in communication. These lacks in communication develop from the unrealistic expectations. The people when they enter into wedlock have certain expectations. When the other person puts a strain on this relationship, they start to feel that their partners have unrealistic expectations.
Participant 6 had stated that she had faced extreme physical abuse from their partner. According to this, there was no option, but to leave the marriage. She stated that she was cornered to stay in the relationship for her children. However, the aspect of extreme spousal abuse forced her to take this step of divorce. 2 out of the 6 participants had also stated that they had stayed in the marriage for their children. They wanted their child to have both parents and they tried to create a cohesive atmosphere for the children. This however translated in yelling fights and created a situation where the children would rather be living with one parents. 3 out of the 6 participants wanted to make sure that their marriage would work. However, the arrival of Children had caused a strain in their marriage. The people wanted different expectations for the child and this had caused the children to also develop issues in the later stages.
The impact of children in a marriage was a special variable that added to the expectant factors of life. The gender roles and the patriarchal stereotypes are enforced in this paradigm. Women even in the western societies are expected to be the primary caregivers of the child. According to the data that has been collated in one research, 68% of the children live with two parents in the United Stated. Of these 23% of the children live with their mothers and only 5% of the children live with their fathers. 27% of the children in the single parent families are comprised in the American families. In this 27%, 62% of the children are forming a lower income background. This implies that the role of money and the social development of the society have led to this condition (Amato, 2010). It is observed that the children from strong familial backgrounds are more likely to attend college and have successful relationship in the future. Having two parents helps the child to gain gender specific support. The current adult population is aware of these facts and they chose to remain in the relationship. This creates the schema that the children become a focal point of the marriage. The decisions are made grounded on how it would impact the children in the process. Psychoanalytic theory plays an important role in the development of the child. Erikson, Freud, and Jung all had professed the importance of child development (Amato, 2010). Established on this, the parents try to emulate the appropriate social interaction. These impact the children in their different stages of development. Owing to this, the arrival of children causes the marriage dynamics to change. Similar ideology was professed by the participants. The arrival of the children helps the parents reminisce their childhood. These also impact the children.
2 of the participants had stated that they want to move along with their lives. These two people felt that they had grown apart in the marriage. 2 of them were still angry about the events and the remaining participants stated that they did not know how they felt about the divorce. This was a complicated dynamic.